Tuesday, June 02, 2009

THE TALK

Gib and I knew that it was coming sooner or later, honestly we were both hoping for later.  

I was trying to get Ellie to go to sleep last night and she started crying and said.  "Mommy, I want to go home now, I miss my dog Gus, my bed and my house.  Why are we still here?"  

As you can imagine that was the beginning of a long talk that I had been dreading.  I tried to explain that she just had a big surgery on her belly and her stomach was still sleeping.  That we needed to stay here to wait for it to wake up.   Also that the doctors and nurses here were able to help her more than we could with just mommy and daddy at home.  

But then I got, "But why do we always come to the doctor? We are here A LOT."  

Ugh.

We talked more about it and how we were working with the doctor to make her stronger and healthier.  And how she was special and that this might take a while.  I congratulated her on being such a strong and brave little girl and that she was doing a great job.  

Then I got, "No I not brave, I'm scared."  

Ugh.

I did the best I could with no prep.  We talked for a long time, it was not easy or fun.  Got her calmed down, told her my version of sleeping beauty and finally got her to sleep.  

I laid there for a long time after she fell asleep just thinking and in awe that my 3 year old just had that conversation.  I felt like I was talking to the 12 year old Ellie not the 3 year old.  I also realized that Gib and I both need to get ready for more of this.  That probably means talking to some one who specializes in this kind of thing.  Luckily I think we are in the right place and will be able to talk to some one today.  

It was hard seeing happy go lucky Ellie be so not happy go lucky.

Other than Ellie shaking her mother to her core, the night was uneventful and we both got a good night sleep. 

She was up and ready to party at 5:50 this morning and has been playing ever since.  We are still waiting for signs that her bowels are awake = clear fluids from NG and G tube, and better yet, farting or pooping.  

They should warn you when your child gets diagnosed with short bowel syndrome,  that  your life will revolve around poop.  Poop! Poop! Yea Poop!  For now we wait and watch. 

6 comments:

Kate said...

Holy crap. And I mean that in every way possible.

evwmom said...

I was wondering how long it would take. She is such a tough cookie! Evan in now in the PICU after yesterdays surgery. The same that Ellie had. We are having some problems on the vent right now, the pain meds are making him too relaxed to breath. Have you had this too?

K8 from CT said...

First, I love Kate's comment. Perfect. Also...it is startling, I'm sure, but she's a really bright kid, so I guess it was coming, though big questions out of such a little girl--Wow. I know you both have great instincts, though, and what you don't got yet you'll seek out. I've heard from everyone that poop will be THE topic of discussion with any babe, but perhaps you could put together a short gut info packet for parents. Call it Much Ado About Poo.

BethBrogan said...

Eventually the fact that she is so bright was going to kick you both in the ass. I hoped it wouldn't happen until she was an obnoxious teenager and I could sit back and laugh at her outsmarting you. I have to think experts at Children's deal with this pretty frequently and will, as usual, have all the answers. She's lucky to have the two of you to answer her questions and remind her every minute of the day how amazing and loved she is.

mbrogan said...

There's nothing that I can add to the above comments. You handled it beautifully. She is a bright girl! Tell Ellie that Gramma and Grampa will see her in the morning.

Rhea said...

Wow - she is a wise little girl with a smart Mom and Dad. It's hard to explain SBS to them - poor Olivia tells me that everything only has two grams of sugar. Even Owen will say "no Olivia too much sugar". She then cries!!! Tell Ellie that we are continuing to pray for her.
Hugs!!!