Thursday, February 22, 2007

In the groove

We have been home for just over two months now and have gotten our feet under us to the point that both of us are scared that we are getting too comfortable and will slip up because the procedures have become second nature.

We attach and detach her pumps so often that we sometimes forget the gravity of what we are doing and what a tiny slip up could mean for Ellie's health. If you do something twice a day, every day, you are bound to have good days and bad days. We individually were afraid that the bad day may mean a serious slip and when I brought it up this morning, Abby told me that she had the same fear.

This leads us to have moments of anxiety at strange times. For example last might at 2 AM I was absolutley sure that we had forgotten to hook Ellie up to one of her pumps. I had the monitor right next to my head and could hear the pumps going but for some reason knew that I had forgotten something and that the pump was sitting next to us on the floor. I woke Abby up, she knew that I was dreaming and ignored me. I woke her up again and she ignored me. Finally at 3AM she woke up enough to tell me to stop worrying and everything was the way it should be.

It was, I was just being a bit whacko.

It is good to have a co-pilot.

Ellie was up at 5:30 (after sleeping 10 hours straight) this morning and quietly standing in her crib and exploring when Abby went in to check on her.

Standing in her crib. Not crying or looking for us, just having a look around at the world.

We got her up before she could hatch an escape plan and spent the morning in bed:
We hung out until her pumps beeped at 7:30 and we started the rest of our day. She loves watching the Today show with us, and even likes an early morning go-round of SportsCenter...


jack said...

This reminds me of thoughts I have while on an airplane. Like pilots, you have a protocol to follow each time, and every once in a while you get the jitters thinking, "Am I doing this right?" The problem is your protocol is so important, right? Anybody would be worried and dream about what you have to do and what you may have missed. You go from that to watching the Today show with that beautiful girl. I know you both. You won't miss a step, but my saying that won't stop you from worrying. You're doing a great job. Keep on keepin' on.

k8land said...

A brief note from the gal who REGULARLY has to turn around, miles from home, convinced that the iron/stove/hot pot/toaster/night light was left on and has caused the house to burst into flames...once again, y'all amaze me. It's nice to know you have moments of human worry, too. Ellie's great about making fears and worry evaporate with a raspberry and a giggle. What a gal.

Anonymous said...

I just told Mom that I've waited almost a year to see a picture of Ellie, daughter of the original Nuka, tucked into her parents bed. I hope her mom has heard the legend and realizes that it's in her genes, and she may never again sleep in her own bed. Ever. Until she's driving.

Jess said...

Ellie just gets more beautiful with every photo. I absolutely love the pic of her in bed--she, as are you both, is remarkable.

Awesome Mom said...

I adore looking at the pictures of your cute little girl!

It is scary when I stop to think about all the medical decisions I have made for my kids. Being a parent is hard and being the parent of a child with health issues is doubly hard. You guys are doing a great job and Ellie will thank you for it some day.